For so many years, as a teacher and a parent (a different kind of teacher), I have worked to help people "improve"... improve their writing, improve their English, improve their lives... And, to be honest, at the same time, I have constantly been trying to "improve" myself - through books I read and classes I take. I'm all for self-improvement and lifelong learning!
So I am really challenged when I read (in Seeking God) Esther de Waal's comments on Benedictine hospitality, welcoming others in the same way that we would welcome Christ:
"... if we are really to receive everyone as Christ that means that we must respect each as made in the image of God and not of ourselves... Unless I am careful I am tempted to manipulate the people in my life (and here this is not simply the guests but my own family, my friends and colleagues, even casual acquaintances). I find I batter them with my demands, or force my own expectations upon them or so influence them that they feel bound to act in a way that they know will please me. I have in fact failed to accept them as they really are. I have not been content simply to be alongside them in their littleness and their weakness, their frustration and their depression. Perhaps I have tried to improve them or organize them for their own good... I have judged them and stifled them..."
Helping people "improve" (as teachers and parents need to do)... while, at the same time, not judging or stifling them is a fine line to walk! But I must admit, the people I enjoy the most are those who appreciate me as I am, without trying to change me!
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