Acceptance Brings Freedom to Grow

"God isn't finished with me yet!" my mother often used to say, welcoming (or at least, accepting) the fact that there would be growth and change in her life, even as she got older.

I am about the same age she was when she used to say that a lot. Maybe she was newly aware that growth was necessary, even at a stage of life when one expects to be there, wherever "there" is!

I too am aware that life changes in retirement, a season of life that offers so much freedom. There are so few demands on my life that - for the first time - each day is really what I choose to make it! But, like my mother, I want to grow - I don't want to stagnate...

Esther de Waal's book, Seeking God, has given me some challenging thoughts on change and growth. She starts out by saying, "... because we are accepted by Christ ... we can accept others and accept ourselves." (p. 118)

(That idea in itself is food for thought!)

Acceptance of ourselves and others for who we really are - not as we wish we were - allows us to BE ourselves and truly GROW:

"... openness to growth means that I bring some dynamic quality of love into relationships, so that I am ready to change, to renew the pattern of marriage, to encourage my children to grow into freedom, to work at a friendship to prevent it fossilizing at some past stage in my life." (p. 119)

The word "fossilize" struck a cord with me, as it describes what happened to my relationship with my parents. Having lived half way around the world, then across the continent from my parents for many years, our relationship had fossilized... All too often, when we got together, we stirred up hard feelings by treating each other as we had when I had last lived with them (as a teenager) - and they felt their role was to guide and correct me.

Later, when my mother (in her 8os) moved to live near me, we both had to make adjustments! It was a sharp learning curve for us both! But over time - living near each other - I think we both have come to accept each other for who we are - and our relationship for what it is... (even if it isn't exactly what we would like it to be!)