I recently mentioned my disappointment in reading that St. Benedict's solution for conflict resolution was to remind monks that they needed to forgive... and be forgiven... every day.
The day after posting my blog on simply forgiving, I re-read the chapter, and noticed some points I missed the first time round!
Relationships can invite resentment if not handled with care... So...
1. Don't be difficult: St. Benedict's admonishes community leaders to not annoy their brothers. And if a request must be denied, it should be denied "reasonably and humbly."
2. Show respect - and love: "Respect the elders and love the young."
3. Make an active effort to deal with conflicts immediately: "If you have any disagreement with someone, make peace with them before the sun goes down."
I particularly liked the prayer at the end of the chapter on Conflict (in the book, Benedict's Way):
...Wipe up the messes we make, and don't let me get so full of myself that I forget that I've contributed to the mess. Teach me to forgive. Remind me that I need to be forgiven. Lord have mercy. Amen.
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